Dear Inverted Cow friends, I had hoped to install another burst of humor, laughter and awe into your lives this week, but due to unforeseen circumstances I will not.
3 Weeks ago Marianne left to go visit an old friend in Calgary. I had some reservations as this was an old Boyfriend. She was to have a fifth avenue show and visit an AA meeting or two to catch up on old times. Since then SOMETHING has happened. I am at this time unable to know what or why but for the last 2 weeks all I get are cryptic messages. She has my camera so I am unable to show any pictures of anything, and she was supposed to take a few snaps of the house we left in Calgary. Since she has decided to betray everyone I do not have the pictures or the stories I had hoped.
My heart is very heavy as I am attempting to understand why someone would walk away from a healthy marriage and not give an explanation. She says she needs space. I am fighting my demons, the rage, the anger, the jealousy, the uncontrollable desire to cause serious hurt to those who would take from me what I have fought so long and hard to nurture.
I am told I am controlling, But I willingly gave up many aspects of my life just to give you the freedom to grow. I endured hardships both financial and physical, to give you space and time when you need it. I have done things that NO OTHER person would ever do, so that you can heal. I have been there through the worst that life has to offer and now just because you met your old boyfriend for 40 some odd years back I have to give everything up so you can be happy?
Friends I am stressed beyond measure. Today I had an opportunity to visit with the folks and I found out that her dad is no longer sleeping more than a few hours, the reason the stress caused because she wants "space". Give us enough time my darling and you will have your space as there will be no one alive in your wake. You are killing those who love you most just so you can enjoy your indulgences.
Now here is a kicker, I vent off some pain. I say that your actions are causing me to say "OW" and I will be told that I am controlling or something. Well marriage is a 2 way street, there is some give and take but there is always compromise. But now it is your taking and me compromising. Perhaps you need to think about what you are doing and come home so we can work it out, and the people in AA who are saying "leave your husband" they are wrong Your husband is the best support system you can have. At least up till you start sticking the knives in his back.
Friends If you know Marianne please help her work this out before it kills someone.
Genesis 19:26 But Lot's wife looked back,and she became a pillar of salt.
You cant look back! You cannot live in the past.
The Inverted Cow The Chronicles of the Transformation of our place to Something Wonderful
January 28, 2012
January 14, 2012
January the first posting of 2012
Time has come for another post of the Inverted cow. Where did the time go it was jut yesterday (or so it seems) that I posted the last one. The new year is upon us and I think that since the last post was a look back this post will be a look ahead. Hopefully, some of the ideas posted here will happen this year.
Marianne is visiting Calgary this week so I have not had the camera to fill the world with pictures. It also means that She cannot be here to help with my proofreading. So please forgive the grammar and typographical errors that I may have missed.
Stories from the Cheese Wagon.
School restarted here back on the 9th. I am covering a route for driver from the town about half an hour north of here. He is ill and they are waiting on a doctors report to see if he can come back to work. Even if he does not I will most likely be only driving this route until another driver can be found. So far it looks like Feb 1st I will know.
The first day on this route I missed a turn, the little darlings let me drive a mile and a half past it before they told me that I missed it "way back there" . I had to do a turn around on a frozen country road and head back to find the rest of the kids. A few more missed turns and I made it to school.
Then on Wednesday I had one little darling fall asleep on the bus. Now I am completely befuddled as to how she did this as I have all grades from K to 12 on that bus. She had 2 siblings who got off at her stop and neither one woke her up and the other kids let me drive the majority of the rest of the route. I got the radio call about 10 minutes after her stop.
I was lucky as the last two stops on the bus were not on so I was able to turn around and head back to drop her off. We got to her home I drove into the yard and she was still sleeping. I started to worry that she was dead or something because most kids, if they doze off, wake up when the bus stops or turns or something. Her dad came on the bus and had to get her up.
I then saw something that makes me wonder and will probably haunt my imagination for some time. After he got her awake and off the bus rather than go into the nice, 2 story, big, farmhouse they loaded into a small ice-fishing shack/sleigh thing. I thought this was a decoration or something, but like I said the mind wonders what is really happening. Since I never saw dad come out of the house I can only guess that he had been sitting in the "sleigh" and they were going to get something that he had in there. But if I ever find out otherwise...... I will say no more.
I have never had a kid fall asleep on the bus before, not after a 15 minute drive. So this was all a new one for me.
Dreams for the new year.
Since I know the yard sale is a total waste of time and money, this year I plan to do away with the old camper. I have been planning on turning it into a chicken coop for some time. This will be one thing that I hope to get done this spring. It also means the old one that Marianne's folks had built will be torn down.
Also being torn down this year is the old outhouse. I still will need to fill the old hole but I am thinking of using that as a spot for the burned garbage from the dump. In addition the small blue shed is slotted for demo, but that means I will need a new storage place first. So a shed may be built and the other will come down before it falls in.
I am hoping to move my shed and the one usable work shed together on the yard. This will include me finishing the tool organization and getting a few more things put away and unpacked. (was supposed to be a winter project)
I am hoping to remove the layer of black dirt from the garden spot where the chicken coop will be as I will be turning that area into a chicken yard. Yard clippings and chickens will make short work of filling the hole back in.
I also have to remove the remainder of gravel from the first garden spot. Somehow I think me and a spade are getting a workout this summer. (remember the Kubota I want for last Christmas/ birthday?) Also in the digging department. I have to start digging the trenches for the basement foundations for this place before it collapses under its own weight. I sill am looking for rail sleepers (rail ties) that I can use to build the walls. But at this time I may as well be asking for moon rocks.
Last fall Dave (one of the cow guys ) gave me some "firewood" these are nice heavy logs is about 7 foot lengths. I am working on finding a way to make a sawmill to plane them on two sides so that I can stack the logs into a planter box for in front of the driveway parking pad.
Marianne also gave me an idea for a hydroponic planter system. It uses old rain gutters (something I have lots of) and runs water through them with the plants suspended in them. I like the idea, especially for the lettuce that I seem unable to grow here. All I need is a solar pump for the rain barrels gravity does the rest.
Lastly I would like to get started on building an anabolic digester for the septic tank but it requires more digging and work than I think I can do this summer. As if I have enough time to do any of the work I have listed.
Well there is my dream list for the year. Lets see if anything can get built!
Cheers!
Marianne is visiting Calgary this week so I have not had the camera to fill the world with pictures. It also means that She cannot be here to help with my proofreading. So please forgive the grammar and typographical errors that I may have missed.
Stories from the Cheese Wagon.
School restarted here back on the 9th. I am covering a route for driver from the town about half an hour north of here. He is ill and they are waiting on a doctors report to see if he can come back to work. Even if he does not I will most likely be only driving this route until another driver can be found. So far it looks like Feb 1st I will know.
The first day on this route I missed a turn, the little darlings let me drive a mile and a half past it before they told me that I missed it "way back there" . I had to do a turn around on a frozen country road and head back to find the rest of the kids. A few more missed turns and I made it to school.
Then on Wednesday I had one little darling fall asleep on the bus. Now I am completely befuddled as to how she did this as I have all grades from K to 12 on that bus. She had 2 siblings who got off at her stop and neither one woke her up and the other kids let me drive the majority of the rest of the route. I got the radio call about 10 minutes after her stop.
I was lucky as the last two stops on the bus were not on so I was able to turn around and head back to drop her off. We got to her home I drove into the yard and she was still sleeping. I started to worry that she was dead or something because most kids, if they doze off, wake up when the bus stops or turns or something. Her dad came on the bus and had to get her up.
I then saw something that makes me wonder and will probably haunt my imagination for some time. After he got her awake and off the bus rather than go into the nice, 2 story, big, farmhouse they loaded into a small ice-fishing shack/sleigh thing. I thought this was a decoration or something, but like I said the mind wonders what is really happening. Since I never saw dad come out of the house I can only guess that he had been sitting in the "sleigh" and they were going to get something that he had in there. But if I ever find out otherwise...... I will say no more.
I have never had a kid fall asleep on the bus before, not after a 15 minute drive. So this was all a new one for me.
Dreams for the new year.
Since I know the yard sale is a total waste of time and money, this year I plan to do away with the old camper. I have been planning on turning it into a chicken coop for some time. This will be one thing that I hope to get done this spring. It also means the old one that Marianne's folks had built will be torn down.
Also being torn down this year is the old outhouse. I still will need to fill the old hole but I am thinking of using that as a spot for the burned garbage from the dump. In addition the small blue shed is slotted for demo, but that means I will need a new storage place first. So a shed may be built and the other will come down before it falls in.
I am hoping to move my shed and the one usable work shed together on the yard. This will include me finishing the tool organization and getting a few more things put away and unpacked. (was supposed to be a winter project)
I am hoping to remove the layer of black dirt from the garden spot where the chicken coop will be as I will be turning that area into a chicken yard. Yard clippings and chickens will make short work of filling the hole back in.
I also have to remove the remainder of gravel from the first garden spot. Somehow I think me and a spade are getting a workout this summer. (remember the Kubota I want for last Christmas/ birthday?) Also in the digging department. I have to start digging the trenches for the basement foundations for this place before it collapses under its own weight. I sill am looking for rail sleepers (rail ties) that I can use to build the walls. But at this time I may as well be asking for moon rocks.
Last fall Dave (one of the cow guys ) gave me some "firewood" these are nice heavy logs is about 7 foot lengths. I am working on finding a way to make a sawmill to plane them on two sides so that I can stack the logs into a planter box for in front of the driveway parking pad.
Marianne also gave me an idea for a hydroponic planter system. It uses old rain gutters (something I have lots of) and runs water through them with the plants suspended in them. I like the idea, especially for the lettuce that I seem unable to grow here. All I need is a solar pump for the rain barrels gravity does the rest.
Lastly I would like to get started on building an anabolic digester for the septic tank but it requires more digging and work than I think I can do this summer. As if I have enough time to do any of the work I have listed.
Well there is my dream list for the year. Lets see if anything can get built!
Cheers!
Sorry for the quality of the clip,
I am still learning to use the new camera that Marianne bought
and I suggest turn off the sound as
I have not been able to edit out the background noises.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)